Happiness is a journey, not a destination...

2010-06-21T11:24:00.001-07:00

New hair.

2010-05-02T17:10:00.000-07:00

I've gone shorter and the swoop bangs are back. I really love it. What do you guys think?

Real live ROAD TRIP! :D

2010-04-17T09:02:00.001-07:00

So... I've gone on plenty of trips where we were driving for extensive amounts of time, however it was always with family. And yes, it was usually a ton of fun. BUT next month I'm going on a road trip with Ginny to St. George for Maygen's wedding. And just the other day I realized that we're going on a road trip. I had just been thinking about when we got there, but now I'm just as excited for the ride down. I'm sure the novelty of the situation will wear off after a few hours, but still. We're going to get snacks and drinks and make playlists so we can jam the whole way down. So yeah. I'm excited. ROAD TRIP!!
We're going on this trip for Maygen's wedding, like I said earlier. We're going to stay in a hotel in St.George. I've got wedding things to take care of, of course. I've got to be there for May, but I am going to show Ginny the sites a bit. We're staying down there an extra day so that we can go to Zion's. Anyway it all comes down to: I'm freaking excited.
I've noticed that my blogs lack writing skill. They're kind of just a jumble of thoughts and ideas and news. My OCD side is slightly bothered by this. But life is rarely well written, so why should my blog be?

Time for summer...

2010-04-14T11:48:00.001-07:00

I vote that it's time for summer.
Time for sunshine.
Time for grass.
Time for kool-aid.
Time for Popsicles.
Time for dandelions.
Time for flip-flops.
Time for shorts.
Time for tan-lines.
Time for warm nights full of stars.
Time for sweat.
Time for parks.
Time for sprinklers.
Time for squirt guns.
Time for bees.
Time for camping.
Time for vacations.
Time for carnivals.
I could keep going, but it might take forever. Add to the list in the comments with your favorite things.

Time for summer.

Go me!

2010-04-10T11:05:00.001-07:00

I got a gym membership a little over a month ago. I've been going to the gym for about an hour 3 times a week. It made me feel really good. I had more energy, I wasn't sleeping in as much, and it just made me feel accomplished. I didn't have a scale so I couldn't really keep track of my weight. A week ago I decided to buy one. On Saturday April 3rd, I weighed 156 pounds. Ugh. That made me feel a little bit downhearted, but I was determined to lose weight. So, during that day and the next I thought a lot about my eating habits. They weren't really bad. I just drank a lot of soda pop, and if I was hungry at work I would get some fatty snack from the vending machine. So I decided to cut those two things out and see how much it would affect things. I went the the grocery store and got a few things I could snack on at work and some power-ade to substitute in for soda pop. So all this past week I've had carrot sticks instead of potato chips and apples and oranges instead of candy bars. I've also had pretzels and wheat thins. I stepped on the scale this morning hoping to see a difference. I wasn't disappointed. Just cutting out those two things and exercising 3 times a week had made a drastic improvement. As of today, I weigh 140 pounds. In one week, I lost 15 pounds. To all the people that have been telling me that's all it takes: My bad, I'm a believer now. :D Go me!

Going back...

2010-04-01T10:19:00.000-07:00

So, I'm planning on returning to Provo tomorrow for the day. I let a bunch of people know so that I could see all the people I've been missing. Most people seemed excited to see me, but some people don't seem so excited. That makes me sad, but it's probably my own fault. I'm terrible at texting/emailing/calling people. It's not that it makes me nervous or anything, I just don't think of it. I've been up here for 7 months now, and I've had minimal contact with people I used to spend everyday with. I've missed everyone immensely. During the first two months I was pretty depressed about the whole moving situation. I was lonely, but I still didn't text or anything. I don't know what my deal is. I feel bad for unintentionally severing ties with all of my friends. If you're reading this, and you're one of those people, I'm so sorry. I hope the damage isn't permanent. I'm really excited to see everyone tomorrow.

Today is April Fools Day, probably my least favorite holiday. What's the point? Everyone just pulls pranks or "jokes" by lying about something. I don't really like spending the whole day wondering if the person I'm talking to is lying or about to attack me with a squirt gun. It makes me feel paranoid. But, oh well. I'll deal. I don't really like the idea of being "that girl that will bite your head off if you play a joke on her". So I'll zip-my-lip and take it.

Missing some things...

2010-03-22T11:17:00.000-07:00

I miss living at home in Provo (with the Ferrins). I miss being able to cuddle up with mom after a bad day, talking to Claire well into the early hours of the morning, playing in the backyard with Abby and the bunny, randomly hearing Thomas at the piano, hearing dad say family prayer at night, taking walks along the river trail with Steve, and lots of other random things. Hearing the wheat grinder, speed scrabble, puzzles, toast... the list could go on and on. I need to go visit. Life just seems too busy. And I sorta worry about not wanting to leave once I get there. I also worry that I've waited too long to visit and it will be awkward if I go now. That's probably not true, but I'm a worry wart. I can't help it.

Slacker

2010-03-11T10:56:00.000-08:00

So... I'm a real blog slacker. I just never know what to blog about. I'll try harder, promise.

There's not much new going on. Work is still good. I feel like I'm doing well, and my team leader says that I am. I'm one of the top CA's (Communication Assistant) on the team as far as efficiency and test calls go (test calls are fake calls that supervisors do to see if we do it well). I enjoy the work. I feel like it's a good thing to be doing.

Granted, people take advantage of the service. We get prank calls (usually young teenagers that think it's funny to make people say inappropriate things) and we also get fraud calls (people that aren't actually deaf that are trying to get money out of people, either by selling something or pretending to be someone they're not and getting bank information). During either of these calls, we have to relay them. The only way to get out of a prank call, is if either of the callers tries to bring you into the conversation. If they try to talk to you or verbally attack you, a supervisor comes over and tells them that the call is being tracked or something like that and the callers usually get scared and hang up. With a fraud call, we have certain criteria that has to be met. If the caller cannot provide information to a bank or provides incorrect information, that's criteria. If the caller is buying something and wants to overpay and have the rest of the money wired to them, that's criteria. Lots of things. If the call meets criteria, a supervisor comes over and warns the hearing user that the call might be fraud and they should use caution and then asks if they want to continue with the call. If they want to continue, there's nothing we can do.

There was a call that I got to a bank and the "deaf" user met criteria. They couldn't answer two of the security questions, and they asked about an account that they didn't actually have (asked for the balance of their checking account, they didn't have a checking account). So a supervisor came and warned the bank teller and the teller continued with the call. The "deaf" user then said that they had forgotten their password for online banking. So the teller CHANGED THE PASSWORD! Even though the caller didn't answer all of the security questions. I think if this ever happened and it was my bank I heard doing that, I would switch banks. I was so shocked.

Wow. Look at that, I actually DO have something to blog about. Hmm... cool. Anyway, I think that's enough for now.

Heartbreaker

2010-02-05T22:41:00.000-08:00

Breaking someones heart is the worst feeling in the world. Some girls boast of being heartbreakers. I don't think they've actually broken someones heart. It's not something to boast about. Breaking someones heart is harder still if you care about the person. And worse still if you loved them. I have recently gained the title of heartbreaker. It makes me feel like I don't deserve to be happy. I want to heal the wounds I've made. I want to be friends again. But I don't think it's what he wants, and it hurts. But maybe I deserve it. Maybe this is karma coming back around to get me. But as much as it hurts to break someones heart and as much as it hurts to think he doesn't want to be my friend, I know I made the right decision. I've changed. I feel like I've said that a million times in the past month. But I don't know how else to explain it. I'm still figuring things out myself.

I just re-read this post, and I'm not sure it makes a lot of sense. But the point I was trying to get across is that I've earned the title of heartbreaker, and I'm not proud of it.

A New Chapter

2010-01-17T20:21:00.000-08:00

Sometimes life flows in chapters. Today is the first day of a new chapter for me. I know that it's only been 5 months since my last post, but it seems like everything has changed. My wants, my priorities, and my outlook on life have changed. I've just started working at Sorensen Communications as a relay operator. I relay conversations between deaf and hearing users. I read what the deaf person types to the hearing user over the phone, and then type what the hearing user replies to the deaf user. I'm catching on quickly and enjoying my work there. I'm still living with my parents in West Valley, and I'm very happy here. I love being close to my family. We all joke, and talk, and play together. Me and Ben are no longer together. It hurt. A lot. But for whatever reason, I feel like this is the direction my life is supposed to be going. I hope one day that we can be friends... but I'm not sure if that will be possible.

I'm not exactly sure what the future holds anymore. I thought I was sure, but I've changed. I'm going to live each day to it's fullest and try to continue to discover more about myself.

Moving

2009-08-13T09:51:00.000-07:00

Due to recent difficulties in life, I am moving to West Valley to live with my Dad. It was a very difficult decision. I don't want to leave Provo. Provo is my home. I've lived here longer than I've lived anywhere else... But, I can't stay right now. I'll be back. I just have to go away for a few months. I need to de-stress and address my increasing health problems. I only have a week left, and even though I'll only be around the point of the mountain, I feel like I'm saying good-bye. I'll miss Provo, and all my friends... wish me luck.

Huge Ginormus Catching-up Post

2009-08-07T08:39:00.000-07:00

It's been about two months since I wrote anything so I figured, pictures or not, I need to update. The first thing I should write about is my trip to St. George. I went down there with Mapleton Chorale for choir tour. It was a lot of fun. We stopped at several pioneer memorial and such and had a great concert in the tabernacle. After tour, I stayed in Hurricane with my friend Maygen. Maygen and I haven't seen each other since fifth grade! We hadn't even spoken since then until last year around December. I stayed with her for a week and it was AMAZING! We had so much fun and it was really therapeutic for me to be in the town where I lived with my mom and step-dad. The two years we lived there were really hard years. It was a stressful and abusive environment to live with them. But going back really helped me. One of the days I was there we went and saw all of the houses that I used to live in. The one that I wasn't sure that I was actually going to see was the ranch. We lived there because Morgan, my step-dad, was the grounds keeper. The small cabin we lived in was far far too small, but the grounds and the mansion were amazing. The wilderness out there was my escape. We drove up to the gate and we weren't sure if we could go in. I knew I wouldn't know the new grounds keeper, but I hoped that I could explain things and he'd let me look around a bit. I wasn't expecting to see John, the owner. Once I told him who I was he was very excited to see me. He told me that I could make myself at home. So I took Maygen on the tour. Starting with the cabin that I lived in. It had been turned into a small office. It seemed smaller than I even remembered. After we saw the cabin we went into the mansion to look around. I was amazed to remember the smell of the Kitchen. Nancy, the owners wife, would make us sandwiches when she was visiting. The mansion was basically the same except that a few of the last things that were unfinished when we left were now finished. The Sanchez', the owners, opened it as a health facility for people recovering from surgery and such. After we finished in the mansion, we looked around the grounds slowly making our way to the horse field. When I was 11, my mom and dad, my real dad, bought me a horse for my birthday. I was going to train to be in the Rodeo. When my mom moved us, we weren't able to take my horse with us, so it was left behind on the ranch. When Maygen and I got to the field, I wasn't expecting my horse to still be there. She was. Her registered name is She's a Little Storm, or for short, Sheesa. She looked amazing! And all the other old horses were there. I was so happy to see them, especially Sheesa. I believe that horses are very smart creatures and recognize familiar things. As I walked to the fence, she came right to me. I'm sure that she recognized who I was. I cried, and it was hard to leave her again, but it was good to see that she was alive and well. I think that was the most therapeutic event of the week for me. We also went to museums, shopping, we saw Footloose at the Tuachan, we hiked in Zion, we tubed down the Virgin river, and lots of other things. It was amazing week. I missed Maygen and it was SO great to spend time with her again. I'll be going down again next year in May for her wedding. (Love you Maygen!)
This summer has gone by quickly. Ben and I have been spending most weekends at my dad's house in West Valley. We also went to LA for a trip with Primerica, a business we've been starting. We went with Ben's parents. It was a tiring trip, but worth it to swim in the ocean for my first time. It was so much fun! Even though I almost drowned a lot... :) We also went to Mirror Lake on a camping trip with his family. Ginny came too. That was also a lot of fun. I haven't been to the high Uintah Forrest's for several years, it's so beautiful!
We had a little party with all the people that we used to spend everyday with last summer. It was fun. It was really good to spend time with everyone and just forgive and forget. :)
Living with Gin, Carrie, and Mycami has had it's ups and downs. It is true that sometimes you can't live with people close to you. Gin and I have always been good living together, but I've had some bumps in the road with the other girls. We've all decided to go separate ways. Carrie will be going to Wyview, Mycami is staying at the Branbury, and Gin and I are going to Wolverine Crossing. I love these girls and they are three of my very best friends, and I want it to stay that way, but we're not all compatible to live together. *shrugs* We tried.
I'm looking for a new job, so if anyone knows of any opening anywhere, PLEASE, let me know. :)

I'll post pictures as soon as I can get my Internet to do it. :)

It's been a while

2009-06-18T10:14:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I last posted, but as soon as I upload a few pictures, I'll do an update post.

Recent Adventures

2009-04-07T18:19:00.000-07:00

The Festival of Colors at the Krishna temple. Ben and his new scooter. Draper Temple open house. Random trip to WalMart.

Valentine Pictures

2009-04-07T18:10:00.001-07:00

I finally got the Valentine pictures! I think they're really cute!

The Good and the Bad

2009-04-07T18:05:00.000-07:00

Life is treating me very well. There are bumps in the road, but I feel very happy. I have amazing friends, and a particularly amazing boyfriend. I am going to a great University and gaining a lot of knowledge. I've gained control of my life financially, for now. Things are going pretty well. There have been a few issues among my friends, but I have faith that we will persevere. I just wanted to write this short blog saying that I am happy, and I want to spread this happiness as far as it can reach. :)

Falling into Place

2009-02-26T08:25:00.001-08:00

Sometimes things have a way of falling into place. The past few weeks I've been stressing a lot about money. My tuition is due on the the first of March, and I hadn't received a grant. I started the process for a loan, but it was taking a long time and I was getting worried that I wouldn't get it in time. Last Friday I was checking my financial center on BYU's website. I was shocked to find a pell grant. It was enough to pay for my tuition and give me a little extra to get some stuff I've been needing. I was amazed that things suddenly worked out. That among other things (ie: scheduling conficts, impending deadlines that I wasn't prepared for, matters among friends) just suddenly worked out. Everything fell into place. I'm contunuily amazed by the love of my Heavenly Father and his awarness of my life. I went to the Draper Temple open house and it was amazing. The spirit was so strong and I knew that my Heavenly Father was watching out for me. I know that He's happy with the way I'm leading my life, and He's helping the little things work out.

The weekend and getting sick

2009-02-19T12:45:00.000-08:00

The weekend at my Grandma's was amazing! Ben and I got to talk a lot about things that we really needed to talk about. We got to know each other in a different way. It was a lot of fun to spend time with him and my brothers. For Valentine's he got me a big teddy bear and a rose. :) I woke up that morning and found them in my room. For our date, we got dressed up and went to Olive Garden for dinner. He looked so great, and I loved the dress that I finally picked (after several maybes and one that I actually bought and returned)! I don't have the pictures yet, but as soon as my Grandma sends them, I'll post them.
Yesterday I started feeling like I was getting sick. I hurt all over and I was extremely tired. I had to miss dance lab, which I was really looking forward to. I went home and Ben sat with me and watched a movie (it's nice to have a boy take care of you when you're sick) and at 10 I took Nyquil. By 10:15, I couldn't feel a thing. :) I slept like a baby for 10 hours! It was amazing. Brie, my room mate, says that I was entertaining... I wonder what she did... Today I feel a little better. I felt rested when I first woke up, but as the day is going on I can feel my body getting really tired. Also, my throat began to hurt this morning and my stomach is a bit upset. Hopefully this won't get too much worse... I've got midterms coming up and I can't miss school or work...

Having a Valentine and showing off my beautiful friends.

2009-02-10T12:42:00.000-08:00

I'm am so excited to have a Valentine. Ben and I are going to my Grandparents house for the weekend. We're dressing up for dinner and going out because he knows that I like to over-dress. :) On a side note, we went to his house a while ago to hang out and Caiti (his youngest sister) fell asleep while I was holding her. We decided to sit and watch a movie and once we did, Cami (the second to youngest child) came to me and said that she wanted to cuddle with me. So I passed the baby to Ben and held Cami. It was a cute experience.
Have I told you how beautiful my friends are? I was just thinking about it, and I am so grateful for my friends and I think they are beautiful. :) I love you all! (I know I have so many more friends than this, but it would take a lot of space to put you all. Know that I love you!)

Monotonous life...

2009-01-28T15:39:00.001-08:00

Life can be monotonous. But it's not boring necessarily. I don't really have much to update simply because life has continued much the same as it was the last time I blogged. Ben and I have been together for a month. Things are still going really well for us. We're both extremely happy.
I'm loving living on campus, but I miss the 8th ward. I went with them last week for an activity at the ice rink. It was a lot of fun.
I'm approaching the first round of midterms and I think things will go well. The only one that I'm a bit concerned about is Astronomy because I added the class late.
Well, I suppose that's all. I hope that I can continue to keep this blog updated even though things are monotonous.

Catching up

2009-01-13T17:09:00.001-08:00

I'm hoping that my life is a bit more in order now, and that I'll be able to keep this updated.
To catch up, I finished my first semester in college... It didn't go as bad as I thought it would. Surprisingly, time seemed to go by even faster than it did in High school.
Ginny, Carrie, Lance, Ben, and I joined Mapleton Chorale so that we could still sing with Mr. Mendenhall. It's a lot of fun. It's very different because the rest of the singers are a lot older than us.
Unfortunately, our group of friends had a little bit of a rift during the months of October, November, and December. I won't go into details because it's not my story to tell, but Ben and Ginny were not speaking. It was finally fixed a couple of days before Christmas.
Ginny and I are no longer room mates. :'( I had to move on campus to accomodate life at school, and she moved home to save money. I miss her a lot, but me and my new room mate, Brie, get along really well.
December was an amazing month. To start off, my best friend from fifth grade found me. She had been looking for me for a while and she finally found me on Facebook. Her name is Maygen Mortensen. We were best friends when I lived in southern Utah. It's been so great to talk to her again. It's like the years apart didn't even happen. We were able to pick up our friendship in the same condition that we left it. I plan on visiting her this summer.
Later in the month of December, another great thing happened. Ben and I are together again. It was totally unexpected. We became "official" on December 23rd. Things are really amazing between us. He is my best friend, and I couldn't imagine being with anyone else.
Well, I hope that I can keep this updated a little better than I have before. :) Wish me luck.

Ah, Summer!!

2008-07-14T22:32:00.000-07:00

It's finally summer, and I've finally graduated! So far this summer I've had a blast! My friends and I have been doing lots of stuff! Hiking, fake girls camp because we'll never go again, tunnel singing, playing like children in parks and movie marathons! Here are just a few pictures from some of our adventures!

Starting a blog

2008-07-14T21:59:00.000-07:00

As I was sitting at my computer, I suddenly had the thought, I should blog. So, here I am. I'm not entirely sure that I will keep this up, but I thought I ought to try!